Angelica Lee Explains Why She Forgave Oxide Pang for Cheating
Angelica Lee’s (李心潔) four-year marriage with Oxide Pang (彭順) was in danger of falling apart after the director was caught cheating with model Liddy Li (李悅彤). However, Angelica has forgiven Oxide and chose to pardon those who have hurt her.
Comparing her life to acting, Angelica said, “In acting, you have to learn how to get out of character once you’re done [with the movie]. Life is just the same. You must learn how to let go. I started to meditate and study Buddhism six years ago. Buddhism teaches loves and wisdom, and it has allowed me to become a much calmer person. There are ups and downs in life. As long as you consider these setbacks as opportunities of learning, you will then know how to cherish every encounter.”
Angelica said she is happy, fortunate, and satisfied with her life. She is not stubborn when it comes to relationships and she refuses to express love in rigid ways. “I want to use my heart to love everyone, to pardon everyone.” Did it hurt to have someone whom she loved to hurt her in such a manner? “You get hurt because you have demands. When you love someone, you shouldn’t have demands. If you don’t have demands, you won’t feel hurt. Be more broad-minded.”
The award-winning actress said she is someone who can easily find exits in situations, and use her wisdom to try to understand the deeper issues. “I believe that everyone around me are my bodhisattva who are helping me with my moral teachings. They’re helping me become a better person. He [Oxide] has tested me and given me a chance to do my homework.”
Obstacles and setbacks will always come in life, but it takes fate to bring two people together. “We should use love to grow, support each other, and share our joys and happiness.”
Source: On.cc
This article is written by Addy for JayneStars.com.
> teaches love and wisdom, and it has allowed me to become a much calmer person. There are ups and downs in life. As long as you consider these setbacks as opportunities of learning, you will then know how to cherish every encounter.”
I get the concept of being contentment and satisfied with her life.
I get the concept of setbacks being learning opportunities for growth, wisdom and maturity, and believe alot in it myself.
BUT I totally don’t get potential harm to self from accepting Oxide back into her life.
She can forgive him yes sure and wish him well for his own future without her … but taking him back in and hoping for the best?!???
She just sounds to me like Vivian Chow.
I know…WTH kind of logic is that? haha LOL..OMG… good luck w/that forgiveness and see how much he will treasure you from now on. Phewww….
Vivian Chow – OMG, that’s another one that we can never understand for as long as we live.
Why? Because it is easier to just accept his cheating with the hope he won’t ever do it again. But he will but this time he won’t get careless. Ignorance is truly and really bliss isn’t it? Once a fool, you pity her. Twice a fool you hate the guy. But many times a fool you start to think maybe she just wants to be fooled because she is settled in this life, this relationship. To walk away from everything you know to the unknown is just too much hassle, too difficult, as long as he comes back to me sort of mentality. Angelica Lee is a beautiful woman, a talented woman, perhaps a philosophical woman and even a forgiving woman. But perhaps she is philosophising too much that it is as if trying to convince herself and doing a bad job at it. She is in the end a fool in love and in matters of the heart, everyone is a fool at the end of the day. When she smartens up, that’s when she will have a life where she will stop philosophising and start living. She has to stop dampening that anger in her and just be really mad. He doesn’t deserve his 3rd or 4th chance but who are we to judge her decision at the end of the day? I find it hard to leave a well settled job even if it doesn’t pay well, more so a well settled married life with a man I presume she loves deeply and her deep conviction to stick with him no matter what. For better or for worse but I wonder, does for worse also include being made to look like the fool?
Angelica, perhaps he will change. Perhaps he has changed. Perhaps the next time you can continue to ignore the obvious and hope for the best. There is nothing moral in any of this, it is in the end a matter of preference. If it is really about moral, morality dictates you should leave him and live a life where you know you will be rid of this undeserving virus. Morality is leaving the man who you know has cheated on you many times, each time getting braver and braver. Moral has nothing to do with forgiving him and going back to him. That in the end is a matter of the heart and fools often makes the worst call but like I said, love makes us all into fools at some point in our lives.
Good luck but you won’t need it because no matter what happens, you made the choice on your own free will.
” “You get hurt because you have demands. When you love someone, you shouldn’t have demands. If you don’t have demands, you won’t feel hurt. Be more broad-minded.””
Sigh. He is DEMANDING you forgive him and take him back. So he can have demands but you can’t? A fool is a fool is a fool. When you love someone you should have expectations. Expectations often come with demands. Demands need not be unreasonable or selfish but it comes with a certain standard. Standards arise because you have certain beliefs. Your beliefs is from your own moral compass. And you can’t have any compass if you don’t have expectations. and you won’t have expectations without demands. And a person without demands is a person who has no vision, no expectations, no future.
Said well, Funn.
I heard this from a person I respected and admired. An exemplary 36 yr old, who has since passed on (cancer). A young mother of 3 young kids, with a glowing career of her own in one of the big conglomerates, a position which far surpassed her husband’s when she was diagnosed.
She was gracious, strong and determined, but took on a lot – filial daughter who guilted and did whatever she could even as she was ill, wonderful mother who sometimes had to man the fort as he was often away.
She was also a forgiving wife who always believed and saw only the positive in her husband.
She had an arrogant and selfish husband I also knew, and couldn’t stand. He also could be extremely charming and seemingly kind/polite, so other less discerning people saw only that other side of him.
Her philosophy was:
Have no expectations, so there will be no disappointment. It’s us who set yourselves up for disappointment with expectations.
There is a cycle of abuse (physical and emotional), which I had commented on in an earlier thread, with willing victims.
Yet there are also genuine giving angels on earth, but often they’re not rewarded for their kindness and magnanimous nature during their earthly existence.
her logic does not make sense to me. ……. anyways, she seems content with his cheating behavior… she’s just waiting to be hurt again.
Uh what? Okay, well you’re gonna get more homework girl.
Love is not only blind, but deaf as well in Angelica’s context.
She is just too good to be real on earth. When I watched “Sound of the Desert”, Wai Mo Kee was super nice and generous to his girlfriend, Sin Yue. I told myself that there should not be that many guys like him on earth. I guess there are real people who are like that.
All the best to Angelica Lee.
Sandcherry, I just started watching sound of the dessert on HTS recommendation (thanks HTS). Although I like Hu Ge, like you I just think Eddie Peng’s character is just so good, too good to be true!
Aw… Thanks Puff! Glad that you are enjoying Sound of Desert. I also thought Eddie’s character is too good to be true. I feel bad for Hu Ge’s character but love Eddie’s character. There are definitely nice people like that on this planet but they are rare. I remember once watching Inside Edition, there was this one lady who was the wife of an athlete or some famous person. Her husband cheated on her many times,but she forgave him and stayed with him. He cheated her over 100 times if I remember correctly. Many may think she is stupid but some may think she is admirable and has a big and forgiving heart. It just depends on how you think of it.
Hu Ge is not a good actor. I can’t root for him at all in SOTD. EP is sooo much better! Sometimes I think LSS is annoying when she prefers HG and ignores EP. Stupid woman!
It seems like you are talking about the characters rather than the actual actors and actresses.
wow she is such a nice person. as long as she is happy and think is right thing to do. wish her happiness and hope her dont cheat again.
I notice lots of Asian celebrities who are buddhist tend to keep a blind eye towards their husbands’ affairs, like in the case of Jackie Chan’s wife, Alan Tam’s wife and now Oxide’s wife. You wonder if it’s really the religion or it’s an excuse.
Using religion as an excuse obviously. How else are they going to confess that they were stupid enough to marry the wrong guy?
Forgiving ‘enlightened’ Buddhist is one.
Some Christian/Catholic wives will also use the same reasons to stay in bad relationships. There is one I know who has gone church to pray for her husband, who has a mistress in China.
Some people don’t want to wake up, or really need their religious outlets to keep themselves sane and convince themselves.
Confession/prayers are another way of talking at least, and some outlet for releasing pent up emotions, even if it is to an invisible God.
I do not think it is the religion,but yes they seem to be using it as an excuse to forgive their husbands. Just like how some Catholics often tell me that as Catholics,they can never divorce. I do not agree with that at all. If you are unhappy in your marriage then you should divorce. they just use religion to justify what they do.
Sounds like she’s giving herself a reason to continue the relationship with her most loved man…. Good luck Angelica.
Will she forgive him if he gives her an STD?
hahahahahahahahahaha
cause she stole him from his first wife. angelica was the third party between his first marriage. what comes around goes around, that’s the rule.
If that is true that she was once a third party before,then that may be one of the reasons she is so forgiving towards his cheating.
I used to really believe in karma and what goes around comes around, but now I really wonder about it all. In many cases,it san just be coincidence.
Meant to say can.
Angelica’s not just nice, she’s borderline dumb now. How many times has he betrayed her again and agaun?
So by learning to meditate and study Buddhism, that makes you a blind eye and let your husband cheat on you without any repercussions? If that is the case, sign me up baby!
Seriously… that’s just BS. Don’t insult Buddhism Angelica, your husband still has his ‘use’ for you that is why you let his actions slip by. Go find another guy to drill your hole, that will make you equal.
“You get hurt because you have demands. When you love someone, you shouldn’t have demands. If you don’t have demands, you won’t feel hurt. Be more broad-minded.”
So.. essentially what she is saying is that if you remove all desire… all passion from your life, you can learn to walk through life happily.
Well, they do say “ignorance is bliss” – I guess she’s trying to obtain that goal.
Sounds to me more like living your life as a zombie. Mindless, uncaring, not asking for anything in return, not expecting those nearest to you to care… just walk through life as if in a hazy fog.
No thanks.
Maybe that is how she living her life? She is now probably numb so her husband’s affairs do not bother her as much as they should? Who knows?
All the people who disagree with her actions are plainly subjective with one track mind. What is so wrong about her choosing to forgive and give the marriage another go? All those talk about a man stray once will always stray again is not only pure speculative, but also judgemental. I have witness frens whose marital was threatened by short affairs, they talk it out and came out stronger. It takes a whole lot more commitment but it is possible. Stop assuming the worse of everyone. There are people who do repent from moment of folly. If the hubby stray again and she still forgive him (like jacket chan wife) THEN that is really stupid. I think everyone deserves one get out of jail pass if the marriage had been good before and the wife can truly not bear a grudge. Look at David beckham, their marriage seemed stronger each year despite his prev affair scandal.
For me, it’s not the fact she’s forgiven him… it’s her reasoning that I disagree with.
Seriously, she’s basically saying that any hurt she felt was her OWN fault for setting expectations on her husband that he would remain true to only her. That’s some messed up thinking. (again, IMHO of course).
I guess it’s more painful if she’s without him in her life. Her life and her choices. Lucky guy!