Louisa So on Loving Boyfriend for 20 Years
Forty-eight-year-old Louis So (蘇玉華) has been dating her boyfriend and fellow stage actor, Poon Chan Leung (潘燦良), for twenty years. Despite earlier reports claiming that the couple intend to get married this year, Louisa clarified that she does not believe in such formalities.
She said, “If it were to just sign a piece of paper [marriage certificate], we can do it anytime. But what difference does it make to sign it? Will the world be a better place? Is it a big deal to anyone? For example, if so and so got married, what does it have anything to do with me?”
Despite their lack of interest in pursuing a legal title as husband and wife, the couple continues to maintain a trusting and loving relationship. In addition to Poon Chan Leung’s strengths, Louisa has long embraced his flaws as well. “I love everything about him, including his flaws like not being romantic, not knowing how to cook, and not ever surprising me. I will still acknowledge, respect, and accept everything about him.”
However, just like any other couple, Louisa and Poon Chan Leung regularly bicker over small matters. When two people with different backgrounds and perspectives come together, there will inevitably be conflicts. Regardless of whether it is small quarrels or monumental disagreements, Louisa shared that she would ask herself one simple question, “When it gets so bad that I can’t take it anymore, I would ask myself, ‘Do I still love him?’ This is very important. If I still love him, then I will continue to persist. To be honest, if we no longer love each other, then there isn’t much more to talk about. If we still love one another, then nothing else is important.”
Both reflective thinkers, Louisa and Poon Chan Leung enjoy thoughtful debates with one another. Louisa shared, “He is a very upstanding person. He is sincere and does not have any distractions. I like his style of deep reflection. Of course, there are times where he is overly detailed and talks endlessly.”
Poon Chan Leung laughed and also shared his admiration for Louisa, “I can learn a lot from her. There’s bound to be a difference in thought processes between two people. Her way of thinking can introduce a new perspective for me. I am a more complacent and simple person. In contrast, she is more defiant.”
Source: stheadline.com
This article is written by Huynh for JayneStars.com.
These two are quite a cute couple! Neither of them really talk about their relationship for publicity unless asked to. I like how low profile they are. I am glad that they have each other.
I wish one of the new TV stations will pick up Poon Chan Leung. He was quite good in “To Be or Not to Be” but he doesn’t seem to suit the style of TVB.
@elizabeth Sweet! I like this couple as well and how they are both so low-key when it comes to their relationship. I also like the way Louisa and Poon Chan Leung manage their relationship overall, especially since they collaborate with each other frequently in stage plays – they seem to do a better job at maintaining that separation between work and personal relationship than most other celebrity couples.
I agree with your sentiment about Poon Chan Leung possibly getting more acting opportunities outside of theater. I absolutely enjoyed his performance in To Be or Not To Be (in fact, that was one of my favorite HKTV series) – he was actually quite natural onscreen and despite what he has said in interviews back when TBONTB aired, I didn’t feel that he had any of those issues that stage actors/actresses usually have when they transition from performing in theater to performing on screen. Last I read, PCL had said that he is interested in filming another series and doesn’t matter which TV station he works with. Personally, I hope he DOESN’T work with TVB because I know they are just going to screw things up (and probably pair him up in a series with Louisa just because it’s an easy route plus they can milk the ‘real-life couple’ thing…we all know how uncreative TVB is…). ViuTV would probably be the best option, since there would be no long term commitment involved due to the fact that they don’t actually ‘sign’ any artists….but then again, who knows when ViuTV is actually going to film another series – their first series Margaret and David (the version with Bowie Lam and Catherine Chau) only started filming last week and from the looks of it, the series will be filming and airing simultaneously (much the same way the TV stations used to do back in the 70s and early 80s). In any case, I look forward to seeing PCL onscreen again, hopefully in a series that will do justice to his acting.
Wow 20 years is a very long time. Marriage is not necessary if they don’t plan to have kids. But if one of them pass away, it can get complicated if they have joint account and what not. They look like a sweet couple for sure!
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@freedalas
No need to be superstitious. We are now in a world of open minded and logical thinking.
@jimmyszeto Once a hypocrite, always a hypocrite. I do not even bother to address her directly as she is an idiot. She call me “insensitive” while she post all her trash on this forum. Just LOL funny sometime the way she thinks. It’s a fact that if they don’t get married that if one passes away, there may be issues. That’s why a piece of paper is important. But what does stupid know? She can’t even tell what is a “fact” or an “opinion.” Yawn.
@happybi
My thoughts exactly. It always goes around blasting this and that but then yells at you and calls you an idiot. How stupid and idiotic can some people be? Just try to ignore as I know it is hard to as the disease can never go away.
@freedalas it’s a valid concern as no marriage means there are certain repercussions when dealing with legalities if something were to happen to the other person. you basically have no legal say in anything.
there are common law marriages but i’m not sure HK upholds this tradition, so correct me if i’m wrong.
i’m really ambivalent towards this topic because while i personally support louisa in doing whatever makes her happy, part of me wonder if she really is doing it because she doesn’t see the need or she just doesn’t care enough about her partner to need marriage. or maybe she has some sort of childhood trauma that prevents her from wanting marriage or she just doesn’t like the idea of being tied to someone legally (which is practical and all but still…).
@coralie @happybi
I think if they are financially independent then it is not important how things are split when one passes away. They may have an agreement that their wealth will be passed to other familiar members or have written in a will for things to be passed on to each other. Marriage can create added pressure mentally although it is probably not far from how their relationship is now.
@jimmyszeto True. If they are financially independent it may not be an issue but if they are together for 20 years already, I honestly don’t think they can separate things so cleanly. So if they bought a house, it’s only under 1 name?
And isn’t it true that even if you have a “will” if they are not legally married that their family can bring them to court over the will?
@happybi
I’m not sure if the rest of the family can drag it out in court if they just assign gifts to each other in the will whilst they are both very aware what they are doing. Not familiar with the legislation. I’m sure they would have thought these things through.
@jimmyszeto Very true. But it’s not only the financial aspect they should be concerned about, there’s also medical issues too. Like, if you’re not the legal spouse, do you have the medical right to act on behalf of your significant other? Though there is the power of attorney to ordain that right to the significant other, it isnt all that convenient IMO.
@freedalas
You need to evaluate yourself before you say anything to anyone.
@happybi @jimmyszeto To be honest, it kind of depends on the relationship itself and the circumstances/background of the 2 in the relationship. Similar relationship has worked well before – take Michelle Yim and her late boyfriend Wan Chi Keung for example – the two of them were never married despite being together for close to 3 decades (I think they were together 26 or 27 years if I remember correctly), yet it never affected their relationship. Even without a marriage certificate, everyone still treated them as a married couple (including both their families as well as all their friends)…plus they had assets together, including businesses and whatnot. Even after Wan Chi Keung’s cancer (which was in remission since the 90s) returned in 2008, they didn’t consider marriage and continued living the way they were before up until Wan Lo’s death in 2010. Michelle was very close with Wan Lo’s family and even after he died, they were still close. Of course, at the end of the day, each couple is different and just because it works out for one couple doesn’t mean it will work out for another, but at least there are some great examples out there of how these relationships CAN work. Ultimately, it really boils down to whether the 2 people in the relationship are happy and are fine with the arrangement. I kind of see this issue along the same lines as a married couple choosing never to have children – just because it doesn’t ‘fit’ within the context of mainstream society’s views on marriage and procreation doesn’t mean the decision is wrong or that the relationship won’t work out….if the couple is happy and content with the way their relationship is, then that’s all that matters in my opinion…..
@llwy12 I think it’s easier if there are no children or money involve. I’m not sure about HK but here in the US there are benefits of being married. For instead tax break and what not. And having a say when your significant is in the hospital and can’t speak for themselves. There’s also health/dental benefits you get if you are married from your spouse job. etc etc. I’m sure some relationship will work if they don’t get married but liked you said, it really depend on their relationship and also their family members.
@happybi
I actually think that if you love someone that much then why not just marry them? It is sad in my opinion to think that marriage is only a piece of paper. It is much more than that. I have seen many cases where it is crucial to be married in order to do certain things. I remember once watching a Korean series where a women had to have surgery in order to save her life. However, her husband had to sign it but the sad part was he could not because he was not legally married to her so they had to ask her mom to sign it. Being not legally married can cause some problems down the line. But then again not being married can also mean that if things do not work out, you just pack your bags and go without worrying about the big process of a divorce.
@hetieshou Everyone are different. Some just feel there is no need which is OK but if they have kids, it can get complicated. Then there are those that want to get marry but can’t. Human mind/heart are complicated. But as long as both side are OK with no marriage then all is good. And if not (Linda/Phil), then just break up and find someone who are willing to get marry.
And for people who don’t want to get marry because they are worried about getting divorce. That is not a good thought process at all!
@happybi
I know but I personally feel if you love anyone enough,then why not marry them if you want to spend the rest of your lives with them? Unless you honestly are having second thoughts about being with them. I totally agree that having kids will make things very complicated if you do not get married. It is not only kids but many other factors can get complicated if you do not get married.
Honestly, if you worry about divorce because of getting married then what is the point of being together in the first place? On the same token, if you are only dating then you can always break up and just pack your bags and go. I find it sad that many people these days do not value marriage and treat it like a curse and think that if you get married then you will divorce. If you are just dating you can break up even more easily which is maybe an easier process since you can just leave without worrying about the long battle of a divorce.
@hetieshou some people just have a lot of insecurities. i think its fine if two people just don’t want to get married because they don’t care for that piece of paper. But if they don’t want to marry because they are worried about a divorce then honestly I don’t get it. Because risk is always involve not just in marriage but in a dating relationship. Why bother having a long term relationship then right? Not healthy to think something is too good to be true. Why start a relationship if one think it will end anyway? Get s prenup if they are worried about the assets!
@happybi
Im married so I understand that other couples might need the insurance of making things less complicated in case they split by not marrying. Although some couples are together for years, initially they thought they were very comparable but after learning more about each other they may realise that this is not the case. We have seen quite a few long term relationship split ups recently and I’m sure being not married they have found it easier to move forward and not let specifics get in their way of carrying on with their lives. I understand that peoples takes on marriage are diffirent and some change their minds on the importance of marriage as time goes by. I can see that you are supportive of marriage. I was too but now I’m more neutra and can feel both sides process of thinking.
@jimmyszeto I am married too with kids and honestly marriage itself is a lot of work. Once there are kids its even more work! The ending of the long term relationship thst we’ve been seeing is mostly because the other half were not ready to get marry and the woman biological clock is ticking. If people think once they are married that everything will be smooth sailing are not looking at things realistically. Being in a relationship or marriage is the same. There are compromise and there are arguments. If they want things to work, it will need effort from both parties.
@happybi
Same here. I have a couple of kids. I’m not sure that the relationships all ended because of the refusal to marry. As we all know relationships are very complicated and it is sometimes difficult to pinpoint the exact reason for the breakup. If one party gives up then the relationship is over. Usually marriages only happen when things are fresh. Relationships normally end in breakups if dragged on for years without commitment as most relationships get boring so there’s the temptation to find another or to discover freedom to pursue other ambitions. This couple is a rare success of a relationship and deserves a lot of credit.
@jimmyszeto that is true. Wishing them the best for sure.
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@freedalas
My posts were addressed to @happybi and not to the entire forum so I’m not bothered if others are bored. I’m not here to entertain others.I know you have been racking up your brains on a daily basis with the intention to show yourself and entertain others. You would be doing an ok job if you didn’t change your mind and keep contradicting yourself. You have improved though since getting thrashed in that long dragged out debate we had weeks ago. In fact you have copied some of the tactics I used so well done for learning so quickly!
@happybi
Well to me marriage is not just any old piece of paper. I find it sad if people want to think it is just an old piece of paper. Marriage is a union between 2 people who want to supposedly spend the rest of their lives together. That is why these LGBT couples fight for the right to marry for many good reasons.If you love each other that much,then just signing that soul called piece of paper will not take anymore hair off your back. I think if a guy only wanted to date and refuses to marry me,then I find something seriously wrong. Of course a marriage/ relationship will always take work to maintain just like with anything. I just strongly believe in marriage as my family does. They would never allow me to date and not marry. They find something seriously wrong with that.
@hetieshou That is true. I think also for LGBT couple, getting married will and should give them the benefits that married couple have. Like health/dental benefits from work and also when one get sick, they can speak on the person behalf. Being married have a lot of benefit and it’s a risk worth taking IMO for people who are worried.
@happybi getting married gives one another legal authority to act on financial issues.
@janet72
Yes,not just on financial matters but many other issues. If you are not the legal spouse then there are many things that you are just not qualified to do.
@hetieshou that piece of legal paper allows both parties to be authorized to decide on many issues. nothing morbid.
@janet72
I still find it sad that some think getting married is just a piece of paper. Just like I worked hard many years to get my degrees which are sadly just pieces of paper.
@happybi i loved Louisa since i was young. glad she found love and that they didnt have to really “seal the deal” with a marriage “to prove their love for each other.” nothing against all the couples that get married but love how this couple stayed strong for 20 years. and dont mind this freedalas, have no clue as i have not been on this forum long and barely ever come and comment but i do stalk the comments section a lot and someone sounds butthurt on past exchanges of words. but im not going to get myself anymore involved and just leave now lol.
@riceball120 yeah don’t get involve but we all got warned from Jayne so will play nice. They look like a sweet couple so wishing them the best for sure.
@happybi oh my, hopefully i wont get in trouble for using that word then.
back on topic, yea, they seem so sweet.
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@freedalas
You are delusional if you think that you can decide on the tones of discussions of the articles. In your perfect world, obviously you want to be the owner and controller of Jaynestars but at the moment you are just an average unrespected member who wants to get noticed.
@jimmyszeto if you were on this forum a few months ago you will find what she post hilarious. Why? Because at that time she was going around this forum making comments on people post saying that people need to post intelligently. And at that time when you had her back in a corner she again went and said this is an entertainment forum and she can post whatever she want. She is constantly contradicting herself. Its hilarious. She is so confused!
@akinu know you don’t visit this blog much anymore but you will find this hilarious as you were around at that time when crazy went and make all those “this is a intelligent comment” etc etc. Ha!
@happybi
I have been on this site since well before they took members. I never read the comments till recently but find it fun to chat once in a while.
Yeh. It looks increasingly obvious that freedalas is changing her philosophy each time to try and get an advantage on others.This would work against somebody who hasn’t read her post history but if you have then she would just sound like a contradicting idiot. she would have gained a bit of respect if she had stuck to the same philosophy but instead she has changed her tone after she was pushed to brink in previous debates realising it didn’t work. She has plugged the little holes in her arguments but has left one big gaping one. One minute saying people can write whatever they want, a week later saying people should stick to the tone of the article is a big mistake that she can’t hide. If I was freedalas I would quietly end my membership at janestars instead of digging a deep hole to bury myself. At least when Abc123 got it wrong she had the dignity to not come back or at the very least came back as a better person.
@jimmyszeto Yep! she is a major hypocrite but don’t admit it. Anyway done talking about crazy. Giving her way too much attention today! Back to ignore mode for time being!
@happybi
Yup,just ignore it as it has no brain….
@jimmyszeto
Well said but sadly it can never shut up and is too thick skinned. Why doesn’t Jayne just ban it? I still do not get why she did not. It does not realize how everyone despises it.
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@freedalas
You are truly lost if you think people wait for your posts. If they are,it is not for a good or positive reason sadly. You need to get out of your imaginary world and face reality. Yes, people have asked about me if they do not see me for awhile. Sadly, you are too stupid to know that.
@freedalas
People also come to see you getting taken apart in debates which they get to witness on a regular basis. Your final posts after absorbing heavy punishment is usually relegated to ‘why don’t you go find a room? Why don’t you kiss? Why don’t you have sex together?A sign of a defeated man.
@jimmyszeto She also love using the “mas*******” word. Such a sicko.
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Omg just love it! “This is an entertainment forum where things are just taken at face value. If you wants to sound intelligent and to engage in an intellectual discourse, take it elsewhere” said the hypocrite who once went through this forum responding to people comments stating people need to post intelligently. And she wonder why people think she is a hypocrite/idiot. Go figure!!! And this is not even her forum! Ha.
What we have here is an honest discussion on a topic that is realistic. No bashing and no whinning from idiots who always tries to inject her personal opinion and think its fact.
If you want me to address you directly, please read what you post first before hitting the post comments button. Unless of course you want to continue to sound like the idiot that you are. Dumb as dumb can be. Ha!
Didn’t Poon successfully propose to Louisa back in 2013?
http://www.jaynestars.com/news/louisa-so-to-get-married-next-year/
She still refuse to make it official after 3 years of accepting his proposal? I wonder if Louisa has some security issue regarding marriage. If not, why not sign on that paper.
The paper might not mean anything to the Louisa, but, it does have strength under the law. That’s why many gay couple want that marriage license.
@kidd i guess they changed their mind!
@kidd
Thanks for the info and maybe she now realizes the importance of being officially married. Yes, that piece of paper has power which is why the LGBT all fight for it. But sadly many that can easily get it take it for granted and no longer value it.